Monday, March 14, 2011

She's Pregnant and I'm Fat???

Remember March Infertility Madness over at  We still hope to see your comments and perhaps even hear your stories!  This week, I'll write a little more about the madness of infertility.  Look for new blog entries there every Wednesday.

Because of my commitment to, I am reducing my episode schedule to once / week on I Want to be a Daddy.  Of course, as a result, quality is bound to improve (yeah, right!).

By the way, JK and I will be having our 5th annual March Madness bracket bet.  In it, we go head-to-head, sheet against sheet.  I will be updating our progress on this blog,, and Twitter.  JK won the first three, resulting in visible shrinkage, but I finally got her back last year.  Still emasculated, but I'm gaining!

Now on to the story!

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This story begins with my wife JK's advanced ultrasound, in the fourth month.  The ultrasound looks great, except that it shows a little funneling.  Doctors call pressure on the cervix funneling, because the lining goes from flat to funnel shaped.  With twins, funneling is normal because of the added weight.  Dr. B, the OBGyn, tells us she will monitor this closely.

The news is good overall, so we happily run down to Houston to tell JK's family the good news in person.  You Wannabe Dads and Moms know how scary it is to tell friends and family good news, because the other shoe seems poised to drop.

It soon would.

Our next appointment, Dr. B did her routine cervical check and emerged with the most terrible look on her face.  She said nothing for a moment, but c'mon!  We knew she had found something that upset her.  JK's cervix had dilated to a centimeter.  Only halfway through the pregnancy and she is in danger of delivering.

The high-risk OBGyn, Dr. F, performed a cerclage that very day; a drawstring-like support that would help JK's cervix to hold the twins inside.  After that, doctor's orders indicated modified bed rest.  That included no more working out.  So we quickly went from a ritual of going to the gym together 3-4 times a week to not at all.

Did I mention that I taught boot camp fitness a decade ago?  Yep.  Absolutely true.  And I was fit!  Sixty push ups a minute!  21:00 5K!  And now...?  Not as good.

I'm 20 pounds heavier now than I was when I taught the boot camp.

Wannabe Dads - infertile couples usually have rough pregnancies too.  I wish I could say that once you are pregnant, the worst is over.  Believe me, it is not.  I've heard horror stories too.  Late term miscarriages.  Still births.  We were nearly one of those stories.

Your life, which you thought was your own, is about to change.  Your wife will need you if she is to survive the pregnancy.  You'll take her to the OBGyn more times than you can count.  You'll sit through her surgeries, feeling powerless and scared.  You'll do it, because you want to survive infertility.  Your role, Wannabe Dads, is first and foremost to help your wife survive it.

But you may get fat too.

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